The Parable of the Pierogi and the Taco-salad from the Gospel according to Trump

13 When Orange-Jesus heard what had happened, he withdrew by plane privately to a solitary place, Mar-a-Lago. Hearing of this, the crowds followed him on foot from the towns. 
14 When Orange-Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he first rejoiced that it was huge, but then wondered if he could build a wall around his country club to keep them out for they could not pay the $200,000 membership fee.
15 As evening approached, Mick Mulvaney came to him and said, “This is a place for the rich, and it’s already getting late. It’s time to watch Bill O’Reilly. 
16 Orange-Jesus replied, “They need to go away. Tell them to get something to eat.”
17“They wish for help feeding themselves for they are poor,” answered the Budget Director. 
18“Why help them?” asked Orange-Jesus. “They are poor and there is not even a 7 among them, let alone a 10. Our old budget had money to help them buy food, to heat their homes in the cold of winter, to provide medicine to the sick. But we should not give them this for it makes them weak and rewards their being losers. But we have here five pierogi, Putin’s favorite, and two taco-salads back at the Trump Grill. That food is the best, tremendous.”
19“But it is not enough to feed the people,” said the Budget Director.
20“Bring the people here to me, to a rally around me and buy MAGA hats,” Orange-Jesus said. 19 And he directed the people to sit down on the grass, taking careful count to prove that there were more people on his lawn than had been on President Obama’s four years ago. Taking the five pierogi and the two taco-bowls and looking in a gold-leaf encrusted mirror, he gave thanks to himself and tweeted out a picture. Then he gave nothing to the downtrodden, but to the army he gave more guns and planes and tanks, though they already had enough and more. 
21 When asked what they thought about not providing food to the poor the Budget Director said, ““I think it’s probably one of the most compassionate things we can do.” 
22 The number of those who died for lack of food, heat, and healthcare in the first year was 10 times more than had been killed on 9/11.